![](\"\/Pix\/Caps\/paris-lib.jpg\")
Early Tuesday morning, the Los Angeles Sheriff released Paris Hilton into the wilds of La La Land. She smiled as she strutted from the jail to her limo. It was like a magical stroll down the red carpet to the premiere of her freedom.<\/p>\nEarly Tuesday morning, the Los Angeles Sheriff released Paris Hilton into the wilds of La La Land. She smiled as she strutted from the jail to her limo. It was like a magical stroll down the red carpet to the premiere of her freedom.<\/p>\n
The only network with sustained coverage of the event was – you guessed it – Fox News. They dutifully documented the momentous trip from the Big House to her big house. They reported feverishly of her yearning for Taco Bell and gourmet cupcakes. They followed as her coach drove through the grounds of the Beverly Hilton (a masterpiece of product placement). And they hovered as paparazzi snapped photos and blocked traffic.<\/p>\n
We can only hope that our own freedom is approaching; the freedom from ditsy heiresses that believe they are entitled to constant fawning; the freedom from a press corps that thinks this nonsense is news. We may still have a few days of Paris regaling us with the travails of her hard-scrabble life before we are at peace. Then we can settle back down to the comfortable familiarity of her nip slips and reality TV inanities.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Early Tuesday morning, the Los Angeles Sheriff released Paris Hilton into the wilds of La La Land. She smiled as she strutted from the jail to her limo. It was like a magical stroll down the red carpet to the premiere of her freedom. The only network with sustained coverage of the event was – […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1,15],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-485","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-general","category-humor"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p4Ijg-7P","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1004,"url":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/?p=1004","url_meta":{"origin":485,"position":0},"title":"Paris Hilton Will See You At The Debate, Bitches","author":"Mark NC","date":"8\/5\/2008","format":false,"excerpt":"OK, I think I've just totally changed my opinion of Paris Hilton. This video is \"hot!\"","rel":"","context":"In "Election"","block_context":{"text":"Election","link":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/?cat=152"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":463,"url":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/?p=463","url_meta":{"origin":485,"position":1},"title":"Paris Hilton: Bustin’ Out","author":"Mark NC","date":"6\/7\/2007","format":false,"excerpt":"It's official! Justice in America has jumped the shark. Every prisoner with a rash should be paroled immediately. Every con who finds their cell too cold, or doesn't care for the food should be sent home. Anyone who still thinks there isn't a class division in legal matters should be\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Art\/Culture"","block_context":{"text":"Art\/Culture","link":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/?cat=9"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1266,"url":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/?p=1266","url_meta":{"origin":485,"position":2},"title":"Carrie Prejean Dishonors The First Amendment","author":"Mark NC","date":"5\/12\/2009","format":false,"excerpt":"In last month's Miss USA pageant, Carrie Prejean replied to Perez Hilton that she believed that marriage should be defined as between one man and one woman. That response ignited a controversy that extended well beyond her role as Miss California. The controversy has since snowballed into a soapy opera\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Censorship"","block_context":{"text":"Censorship","link":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/?cat=56"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":483,"url":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/?p=483","url_meta":{"origin":485,"position":3},"title":"Sitting Schmuck: Alberto Gonzales Ducks Columnists","author":"Mark NC","date":"6\/25\/2007","format":false,"excerpt":"The National Society of Newspaper Columnists awarded its \"Sitting Duck\" award to Attorney General Alberto Gonzales at their annual convention last weekend. \"We're giving the award to Alberto Gonzales, but can't remember why,\" quipped NSNC President Mike Argento, columnist for the York (Pa.) Daily Record. The \"honor\" is awarded to\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "General"","block_context":{"text":"General","link":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/?cat=1"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":484,"url":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/?p=484","url_meta":{"origin":485,"position":4},"title":"Sicko Bumped For Psycho","author":"Mark NC","date":"6\/25\/2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Larry King Live has canceled an appearance by Michael Moore scheduled for Wednesday and replaced him with Paris Hilton in what will be her first post-jail interview. [I alluded to this briefly in my previous post but I thought it deserved a little elaboration.] This decision by King and his\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "General"","block_context":{"text":"General","link":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/?cat=1"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":9379,"url":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/?p=9379","url_meta":{"origin":485,"position":5},"title":"Fox News Hypes ‘Free State’ Study By Koch Brothers Think Tank","author":"Mark NC","date":"3\/29\/2013","format":false,"excerpt":"When you see a headline on Fox News that says \"Americans Are Migrating to More Free Republican States,\" it's a safe bet that it emanates from an untrustworthy, right-wing source. That is precisely the case with the study that Fox is heavily promoting that ranks the \"liberty\" of the various\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "General"","block_context":{"text":"General","link":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/?cat=1"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/485","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=485"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/485\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=485"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=485"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newscorpse.com\/ncWP\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=485"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}