Not So Breitbart: Daily Show vs. Cartoon Network vs. Fox News

The geniuses at Breitbart.com have published another of their astounding revelations that illustrate just how mentally deficient right-wingers can be due to their fixation on bashing anything and everything they regard as liberal.

In a posting that takes obvious pleasure in their analysis of television ratings, the Breitbrats report that Jon Stewart’s The Daily Show and The Colbert Report are not the highest rated programs in the universe.

Breitbrat John Nolte: Just a friendly reminder that less than 1% of the population watch Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert. If it wasn’t for the elite media — the same elite media desperate to convince us these two are some sort of national treasures — hardly anyone would watch them at all.

Via TV By the Numbers:

  • TOTAL VIEWERS
    Comedy Central, 11-11:30 p.m. “The Daily Show,” 1.6 million
    Comedy Central, 11:30 p.m.-midnight ET, “The Colbert Report,” 1.3 million
    TBS, 11 p.m.-midnight, “Conan,” 1.0 million
    Adult Swim, 11:30 p.m.-12:30 a.m. ET, 2.1 million
    Adult Swim, 12:30-1:30 a.m. ET, 1.4 million

Whatever influence Stewart and Colbert have does not come from the people; it comes from the elite. This dynamic duo of left-wing free speech oppressors are about as populist as caviar.

Wow. What a couple of losers. The Comedy Central pair of media satirists can’t even rate higher than Cartoon Network programs. And it serves them right for all that free speech oppressing they are doing [Note to Nolte: Can you provide an example of this?].

What the Breitbrats failed to notice is that their pet network, Fox News, rates even lower than the Comedy Central late night lineup. For the month of February 2012, “In total day FNC placed fifth (vs. news programming) with 1.093 million viewers.”

Ergo: Whatever influence Fox News has does not come from the people; it comes from the slack-jawed yokels. These bombastic right-wing free speech oppressors are about as populist as roadkill.

Do the Breitbrats really think that they are scoring points by attacking Stewart and Colbert, even though those shows have more viewers than Fox News? How stupid do they think their readers are? (Don’t answer that). I reported long ago that Fox had fewer viewers than SpongeBob SquarePants in an effort to demonstrate how the perception of their influence was overly inflated. I also reported that the highest rated program on Fox (O’Reilly) has about half the viewers of the lowest rated broadcast news program (CBS Evening News). But my comparing a news network to a cartoon network actually makes a point due to the contrast. Comparing a comedy network to a cartoon network is really not indicative of anything. Stewart is the first person to say that his program is not a news program and he is not a journalist.

The Breitbrats seem so ecstatic about this that I hate to spoil their fun. But the next time they attempt to characterize a program as irrelevant, they had better check to see if their own TV pals aren’t even less relevant. It is Fox News that is struggling to have an impact on society, and despite their best efforts, they were unable to prevent a socialist Muslim with no birth certificate from getting elected to the presidency in 2008. They aren’t having much better luck in 2012. This is partly due to idiots like the Breitbrats who continue to embarrass what’s left of the reasonable wing of conservatism.

Delusional Bravado: James O’Keefe Dodges Imaginary Bullets

James O'KeefIf there is a more pathetic representative of the cartoon-brained right than video con artist James O’Keefe, I cannot think of who it might be. Despite the fact that he is a convicted criminal who is best known for producing deliberately falsified videos and a sleazy attempt to seduce a CNN reporter on his “Love Boat,” O’Keefe continues to make himself the subject of news reports that exacerbate his already tawdry reputation.

O’Keefe was recently accused of harassing a female colleague, Nadia Naffe, by holding her against her will in a barn at his home in New Jersey, possibly drugging her, and later disparaging her publicly. Naffe has now published her own account of her encounters with O’Keefe in the first part of a series on her blog. That posting resulted in an exchange between O’Keefe and Tommy Christopher of Mediaite.

Christopher sought a response from O’Keefe about the allegations made by Naffe, but characteristic of a narcissistic bully, O’Keefe responded by continuing to smear Naffe:

O’Keefe: The outcome of the probable cause hearing speaks for itself.

If you refuse to publish the fact this person was arrest for domestic violence in 2001 — public record, and you refuse to publish the fact this person sued the Bush/Cheney campaign in 2004, you will be acting in willful disregard for the truth.

Christopher obliged O’Keefe by noting the events O’Keefe mentioned, as well as noting that there were no findings of any wrongdoing by Naffe and that O’Keefe was merely evading the issue by bringing up unrelated matters that have no relevance to the allegations pending against him. To which O’Keefe responded:

“No, informing you about the existence of public court records — that speak to possible motive — was not my only comment to you. For the record, I break a huge story about dead people getting ballots in Vermont. You ignore this and two days later you bring up this issue which was dismissed months ago. You journalists cleary (sic) want my scalp by running lies and fabrications. This is a blatant smear, But it’ll take a bullet to stop me. My price is my life.”

First, the easy part: If his price is his life, that gives us an idea of just how cheap this SOB is. What’s more, I don’t know of anyone who would consider wasting a bullet on this rapidly disappearing media fluke. He’s nearly invisible now with nobody paying attention to his griping but rightist blogheads and smartasses like me who do it for the joy of mockery.

More to the point, O’Keefe is suggesting that Naffe’s motive for her allegations of harassment had something to do with events that occurred many years ago before she ever met him. That makes no sense whatsoever. Then he whines about people ignoring his non-story about dead voters in Vermont where he proved that the only perpetrator of voter fraud was himself. That’s his idea of a “huge story.” Finally, he completes his evasion of the issue that he had originally agreed to discuss with Christopher by declaring it moot because it was dismissed (due to a jurisdictional technicality). I wouldn’t get too cocky if I were him because the judge also informed Naffe that she could bring the matter up again in a different court with the proper jurisdictional authority.

Clearly O’Keefe has an acutely inflated view of himself as some sort of heroic citizen journalist. That impression clashes with reality in that his brand of journalism is nothing more than a childish impersonation of Borat (minus the humor), combined with the delusional notion that anybody cares about his carnival side show antics. That said, I’m still looking forward to the next chapter in his “Adventures of the Asinine,” because I’m beginning to believe that he’s about to reveal his true identity. And when he does we will know that the reports of Andy Kaufman’s death were a hoax.

[Update 3/22/12] Part two of Nadia’s story has been posted. It goes into greater detail about the incident in the barn, but the real juicy material is contained in legal documents that Naffe posted.

Fox News: In Touch With America – Of The 1940’s

Conservatives have been clamoring for the past three years or so that they want to “take America back.” The problem is that they want to take America back 50 years – or more. Evidence of their fixation on yesteryear was poignantly exhibited this morning on Fox and Friends when the hosts featured a segment about a fundraiser for President Obama.

Male Host: We’ve heard a lot about civility recently , and that’s why we maintain only the highest standards of civility on this program. But there’s a kind of a crazy moment at one of these Obama fundraisers. An entertainer named Cee Lo Green I believe, who must be very popular and hip because I’ve never heard of him ever before.
[…]
Female Host: It makes you long for the days of Sinatra, doesn’t it?

Cee Lo Green, of course, is a Grammy-winning artist whose novelty song “Fuck You” was a huge hit. It’s hard to grasp how anyone not living in an underground bunker waiting for Armageddon could have never heard of him. And why Frank Sinatra, a known pal of Mafia kingpins, is morally preferable to a guy who harmlessly and humorously cusses, is not readily apparent.

Nevertheless, Fox is intent on demonstrating the highest moral standards by featuring this story at the top of their Fox Nation web site, as if it were the most important news item of the day. And in their coverage they seem to have no problem with posting, uncensored, the very language that they are condemning:

“Donors at one of President Barack Obama’s fundraisers in Atlanta on Friday received at least one message loud and clear from the Obama campaign: ‘Fuck you.’ Singer Cee Lo Green, best known for his solo career and his work in the musical duo Gnarles Barkley, was entertaining guests at the $500-per-ticket event at Tyler Perry Studios when he prepared to launch into a performance of his song ‘Forget You.’

There was only one problem. Green decided, apparently at the last minute, to sing the uncensored and decidedly unpresidential version of the song — titled ‘Fuck You’ — instead.”

Note to Fox News: The song is not called “Forget You.” That was a sanitized version that Green recorded after the song unexpectedly raced up the charts. And if you’re so incensed by the use of foul language, why did you subject your hypersensitive readers to it – twice?

Thank goodness we have Fox News monitoring the moral fitness of society’s art and entertainment. We know that they can be relied upon to uphold the values that all Americans share (because we all think alike), while keeping up with contemporary culture (as long as it stops at 1950).