Rush Limbaugh’s Predictable Predictions

Yesterday talk radio’s king of drug-addled asininity, Rush Limbaugh, settled into his paranoid dementia to dispense his predictions of a future wherein democracy is carried out and President Obama retains his residency of the White House. Limbaugh has a well known disgust for democracy if its results are not to his liking. But yesterday he let loose with a dire forecast that must surely have rattled the marbles inside his followers dittoheads.

9/10/2012: “If Obama’s re-elected, it will happen. There’s no IF about this. And it’s gonna be ugly. It’s gonna be gut-wrenching, but it will happen. The country’s economy is going to collapse if Obama is re-elected.”

Uh oh. What ever will we do now? Limbaugh has divined the course of our destruction and there appears to be no way out other than casting our votes for Mitt Romney, a man who will not tell us what his plans are for the economy; will not release his tax returns; will not disclose his wealthy campaign bundlers; will not stick with the same position for more than a couple of hours; and has a record of destroying jobs while bankrupting companies and stashing his ill-gotten gains in foreign banks. Yeah, that’ll save us.

And, as we know, Limbaugh’s predictions are so accurate that we absolutely must heed his every word. We know that his vision of certain doom is looming over us because his prior prognostications have been so on target. Two days after Obama was elected in 2008, Limbaugh said…

11/6/2008: “The Obama recession is in full swing, ladies and gentlemen. Stocks are dying, which is a precursor of things to come. This is an Obama recession. Might turn into a depression. He hasn’t done anything yet but his ideas are killing the economy. His ideas are killing Wall Street.”

That was two days after the election. Obama was still two months from being inaugurated. And since then the stock market has died to the tune of more than doubling in value. The ideas that killed Wall Street worked so thoroughly that anyone who invested when Limbaugh made those remarks must feel like they’ve died and gone to heaven.

There is another prediction that Limbaugh made yesterday in the same rant. This one is more pointedly political but just as important to our nation’s well being going forward:

9/10/2012: “[Chris] Matthews was saying…if Obama wins it’s the end of conservatism. Nope. If Obama wins let me tell you what it’s the end of … the Republican Party.”

You promise? We can only hope and pray that you’re right about that one.

Rush Limbaugh


6 thoughts on “Rush Limbaugh’s Predictable Predictions

  1. Laura Ingraham joins her pal, Rush, saying:

    “If you can’t beat Barack Obama with this record, then shut down the party.”

    I agree.

  2. And add George Will:

    “If the Republican Party cannot win in this environment, they have to get out of politics.”

  3. Rush Limbaugh lies so often that when he is speaking on his radio show you can pretty much assume it is not true. I would like to go back and hear some of his predictions about Clinton, none of which came true, if they were the same ones as republicans, like Newt Gingrich, who predicted economic collapse if his tax increases were passed. Not only did that preDiction not come to pass but the opposite happended and we saw one of the strongest economic expansions in post WWII history and the budget was balanced for the first time in many decades. If Obama is reelected and none of this comes to pass he will give credit to the republicans just as he is now trying to credit the GM bailout success to Bush after his predictions of that becoming a fiasco failed to come to pass. RUSH LIMBAUGH CAN GO F%$K HIMSELF!!!

  4. Anybody know which horses Limbaugh is betting on this week? How ’bout the NFL–which teams does he think are the losers? I should be rich after picking opposite of the drugster.

    • Hmmmm. Drugster? Read anything that our own President Obama did cocaine? Or maybe that’s okay because he’s sooooo cool.

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