Jonah Goldberg’s Stench Of Humor

Posted by on November 7, 2007 at 6:39 pm. NO Comments :

In another classic example of the wanker’s prose, Jonah Goldberg has penned a column for the Los Angeles Times that proves he can’t tell reality from satire.

The column begins with a quotation from Saturday Night Live’s news spoof about the the recent news conference held by FEMA wherein they planted agency stooges who pretended to be reporters asking real questions. Any ethical journalist would be appalled at such a fraudulent tactic designed exclusively to deceive. But Goldberg, of course, is not an ethical journalist. He actually dismisses the deceit by saying that…

“There’s no such thing as fake questions, after all, only fake answers.”

What the HELL does that mean? If there are no fake questions then there are no fake answers either. There may be false answers or lies, misrepresentations, obfuscations, or diversions. But all of those are as real as 90% of the answers that come out of the present White House.

If anything, Goldberg has it bass ackwards. There are indeed fake questions. They come from people who are fake reporters or reporters who have surrendered their independence to powerful figures in government. For examples of fake questions see Armstrong Williams or Jeff Gannon.

Goldberg goes on to excuse FEMA’s deception by asserting that all of the media is guilty of the sort “foolishness” FEMA was caught committing. I can’t really argue with the notion that the media is rampantly foolish, but Goldberg supports his claim, not by citing instances of media failures, but by citing comedy shows that mock the media. He points to Stephen Colbert, and Jon Stewart as evidence that the media is fake. Somehow it has escaped him that Colbert and Stewart are comedians and not journalists. The fact that they are more informative, relevant, and honest than most news enterprises is just a coincidence that delivers a sad commentary on the state of the news media.

Ultimately, in a fit of classic dementia, Goldberg declares that Murphy Brown is to blame for the problem of parsing fact from fiction. That’s right, the same sitcom character that vexed Dan Quayle. Goldberg says the show is…

“…about a fictional TV newswoman who talked about real newsmakers as if they were characters on her sitcom. When Brown had a baby out of wedlock, Vice President Dan Quayle criticized the writers of the show. Liberals then reacted as though Quayle had insulted a real person.”

Not exactly, Jonah. It was Quayle who insulted a fictional character as if it was real. Liberals just laughed at him for doing so. (By the way, he was also insulting every real, unmarried woman who chose to carry a baby to term). And now we laugh at you for ascribing all the flaws of modern journalism to the same figment of a TV scripter’s imagination.

It is Goldberg, however, who is the joke. His attempt to compare the inexcusable dishonesty of the FEMA event with the antics of comedy programs would be hilarious if it weren’t so depressing. Whatever his opinion of political satirists, he ought to be able to tell the difference between them and government agencies whose mission is to protect real people from real disasters.

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I’m Baaack…

Posted by on November 7, 2007 at 4:02 pm. NO Comments :

Look out media overlords – News Corpse is back. I took a vacation to recharge although I’m not sure it had that effect. My two week visit to Europe may have been more exhausting than my routine existence here at home. Plus, I still have to recover from jet lag.

My trip began in Barcelona where I was greeted by this warm tribute to tourism. This message was strategically placed on a rooftop that is visible to the many visitors to the Gaudi-designed Park Guell.

We hopped on a train north to Figueres, the site of the Salvador Dali Museum. The taxi driver that took us up to the museum neglected to inform us that the museum was closed on Mondays until after he had dropped us off and collected his fare. As it turned out, it was a pleasant scam. We decided to spend a night in Figueres so that we could see the museum the next day and it turned out to be one of the best stops on the trip.

From there we went by car to Avignon and Nice in the south France. Avignon was exactly the charming and historical town we had expected. We also drove through Arles with its Roman-style Colosseum and Van Gogh landmarks. Nice was somewhat more of a commercialized tourist trap than we had expected. But all of it was fun and enriching.

The final stop was Florence. I’ve always considered Florence the Mecca for artists (if you are an artist you have to visit at least once in your lifetime or you won’t go to Heaven). It was astonishingly beautiful with art literally around every corner. As an extra added bonus, I badly sprained my ankle at the Uffizi Museum. If you’re going to injure yourself, you might as well do it at one of the world’s great repositories of art.

I apologize for not posting more while I was on the road. I intended to but there just wasn’t time. I noticed that during my absence, Glenn Beck’s hordes discovered a post I wrote last August that featured a rather repulsive Photoshop satire of Helen Thomas. Beck’s childish minions descended on News Corpse demonstrating that they couldn’t get a point if it was on the top of their little heads. But it was nice of them to boost my traffic for a few otherwise non-eventful days.

Now it’s back to the work of bringing down the corrupt and compromised Corporate Media. The fight continues…


Not Much Going On

Posted by on October 29, 2007 at 1:15 pm. NO Comments :

While I have been preoccupied with unspecified clandestine activites, not much has occurred in the world of media – unless you consider FEMA staging a fake press conference with FEMA staff posing as reporter “something.”

And it is certainly nothing groundbreaking when Fox News analysts spend their air time promoting a U.S. attack on Iran.


News Corpse On Assignment

Posted by on October 24, 2007 at 12:41 pm. NO Comments :

For the next couple of weeks I will be engaged in activities that will preclude me from delivering my usual stream of enlightening essays and insights. Is it the intrusion of work? Vacation? Or a top secret mission to infiltrate Rupert Murdoch’s international disinformation cartel? I’m not saying.

I should be resuming my regular schedule of posting on or about November 5. In the meantime, I will be linking to other fine blogs and news sources that are working hard to reform our media.

Like this one from ThinkProgress:

Fox News: Al Qaeda is causing the CA wildires

This morning on Fox News, hosts of the show Fox and Friends blamed the wildfires in California on a new culprit: al Qaeda. They pointed to a 2003 FBI memo, which raised the possibility that al Qaeda may try to set wildfires around the western United States. They also noted that men in a “hovering helicopter” saw “a guy starting one of these fires.”

Conspiracy theorists will want to know if the hovering helicopter was black. The rest of us can’t stop laughing.


The Stephen Colbert Campaign Catches Fire

Posted by on October 23, 2007 at 12:23 pm. NO Comments :

Since announcing his intention to seek the nomination of both parties for President of the United States, Stephen Colbert has demonstrated a deft media strategy (appearing on Meet the Press, Larry King, etc) and popular appeal. In the first poll to be released since his announcement he shows both strength and promise. Here are the results:

Candidate: Percent:
Clinton 40
Obama 19
Edwards 12
Biden 2.7
Colbert 2.3
Richardson 2.1
Kucinich 2.1
Gravel <1.0
Colbert has surged ahead of New Mexico governor Bill Richardson and is threatening Sen. Joe Biden in the Democratic primary. On the Republican side he is lagging in Tancredo territory.

What this suggests is that Colbert may be the conservative candidate best able to make inroads into Democratic and Independent ranks. These early poll results should tell the rest of the field that voters are anxious for new ideas and are looking for candidates who espouse Truthiness as opposed to the same old so-called “facts” that are scattered by pundits and spinners.

Congratulations Stephen, and good luck.



Olbermann Tops O’Reilly Again

Posted by on October 22, 2007 at 6:36 pm. 4 Comments :

It happened again last Friday. Keith Olbermann’s Countdown beat Bill O’Reilly’s Factor in the key 25-54 demo. And this time it was without the benefit of an NBC appearance to boost Olbermann’s numbers.

10/19/07 5p: 6p: 7p: 8p: 9p: 10p: 11p:
FNC BigStory: Hume: Shep: O’Reilly: H&C: Greta: O’Reilly:
  143 201 257 238 248 253 218
CNN Blitzer: Dobbs: Blitzer: Honest: King: Cooper: Cooper:
  197 229 190 172 283 136 150
MSNBC Hardball: Tucker: Hardball: Countdo.: Investig.: Investig.: Investig.:
  110 58 113 263 186 251 325

O’Reilly has been chalking up some high numbers recently, but he is still vulnerable and Olbermann is still growing at a much faster rate.

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John Edwards’ Letter To The FCC

Posted by on October 20, 2007 at 1:33 am. 1 Comments :

Responding to the FCC’s proposed new rules for media ownership, John Edwards has written a letter addressed to Commission chairman Kevin Martin. Like his predecessor Michael Powell (Colin’s boy), Martin has drafted a set of rules aimed at advancing the interests of Big Media conglomerates and permitting them to get even bigger and more powerful. Powell’s initiative was halted by over three million Americans rising up to oppose the media’s power play and now we have to do it all over again.

The letter Edwards sent is a great way to reignite this fire. Edwards is showing the sort of leadership that is in short supply in Washington. He is the only candidate of either party to speak so forcefully on behalf of a diverse and independent media.

Some excerpts:

“I urge you to cease your efforts to radically rewrite the rules preventing excessive media consolidation. You and your fellow commissioners have the responsibility to ensure that our nation’s media is open, democratic and as diverse as the American people, and not – like too much of our economy and our political system today – dominated by the wealthiest Americans, large corporations and their lobbyists.”

“The result of all this over-concentration, Mr. Chairman, is a poorer democracy, with a few loud corporate voices drowning out independent perspectives and local participation.”

“High levels of media consolidation threaten free speech, they tilt the public dialogue towards corporate priorities and away from local concerns, and they make it increasingly difficult for women and people of color to own meaningful stakes in our nation’s media.”

This is the kind of courageous and principled action that we ought to be getting from all of our candidates and representatives. Who do they think they are representing anyway? It certainly is not the people if they continue to act on behalf of giant multinational corporations that are only interested in their own wealth and power.

John Edwards deserves a lot of credit for getting in front of this train. The media is quite capable of ruining the reputation and electoral prospects of candidates they oppose or fear – just ask Howard Dean. I urge everyone to reward Edwards with support, donations, or just a few kind words of appreciation. But it is just as important to let the other primary candidates and current members of Congress hear from us about this. We must flood their email boxes and jam their phones. Visit Stop Big Media for more information and assistance with contacting your representatives.


Rejected PBS Documentary To Air On Fox News

Posted by on October 19, 2007 at 12:45 pm. 2 Comments :

The “Islam vs. Islamists,” episode of the PBS series “America at a Crossroads” is now scheduled to air on The Fox News Network. PBS had declined to broadcast the segment because they deemed it “alarmist” and “overreaching.” That description must have made Fox’s mouth water. Seeing as how alarmist and overreaching is the stock in trade for Fox, they probably couldn’t have signed this deal fast enough.

The Fox airing will bundle the documentary into a program that will also include interviews of the producers, giving them a platform from which to bash PBS as a bastion of liberal bias. Never mind that the president of the Corporation For Public Broadcasting, Patricia S. Harrison, is a former chair of the Republican National Committee. She was installed by the thoroughly corrupt Kenneth Tomlinson. The bashing of PBS has already begun .

This broadcast follows similar projects by Fox, airing or reporting on discredited or otherwise unreliable programs including:

Seems like Fox is ratcheting up their already prodigious propaganda machine.


Fox Business Network: Porn And Patriotism

Posted by on October 19, 2007 at 1:34 am. NO Comments :

The new Fox Business Network has launched and is rapidly proving itself to be faithful to the Murdochian Doctrine of Porn & Patriotism. It’s a business model that aims directly at America’s horny nationalists.Now they are narrowing their target to horny nationalistic investors. Is there really an audience for “America’s Next Top Business Models?” While I admit to taking some liberties with the ad at the left (here is the original ad), the slogan at the top (Your second opinion arrives today) is unadulterated and is an admission that Fox traffics in opinion, not news. And I wonder why they chose to include the World Trade Center Towers in the background.

Well, the early reviews are in and they are affirming the net’s vapid approach to journalism as pioneered by the Fox News Channel. First at the gate to critique the new net is its godfather, Rupert Murdoch:

“It’s two and a half to three days old and looks just terrific. Everybody, even in the industry, (recognizes) how different it is to CNBC, which is half-dead,”

You might wonder why Murdoch is spending hundreds of millions of dollars to enter a business whose top performer is “half dead.” And if CNBC, with a potential audience of 90 million households is half dead, than what’s so terrific about FBN which passes only 30 million homes?

[Speaking of terrific: FBN launched on Monday. The Dow was down every day this week. Total loss for the week was 517.06. Coincidence?]

Brian Lowry at Variety has the most humorous take on FBN. And it’s funny because it’s true. Lowry highlights one of FBN’s strengths pointing out that they “trump CNBC’s ‘money honey’ with a veritable money hive.” He mocks the network’s reliance on Stepford anchors in short skirts interviewing patrons of Myfreeimplants.com. But he hits his stride describing the network’s patented political prejudice:

“…the channel has enjoyed solid initial access to CEOs and Republican officials, and Neil Cavuto – the signature primetime voice – practically crawled into GOP presidential candidate Mitt Romney’s lap to be read a no-new-taxes bedtime story.”

Ronald Grover at Business Week delivers a column that is mostly complimentary, although the features that Grover praises might be considered flaws by most discerning viewers. For example, he is enthralled by a segment wherein anchor David Asman attacks Democrats. Even though he concedes that Asman’s analysis is faulty, Grover says, “Who cares?” because he was entertained by it. I’m not certain that other viewers will be so forgiving. Grover himself engages in some faulty analysis describing why he thinks that FBN will succeed:

“Murdoch clearly wants to bring business to Main Street, NASCAR, and younger folks who like to mix stock chatter with their after-hour cocktails.”

Does Grover really believe there is a huge under-served audience of young NASCAR fans hankering to yak about the stock market? Does Murdoch? If that’s their target demo they might be better off actually launching a patriotic pornography channel. Oh, wait a minute…That would be the Fox News Network.

Other news outlets offered up dueling headlines. Reuters declares that “Fox Business launches to lukewarm review.” Analyst Andrew Tyndall found the network “hard to watch” and observed that…

“They appear to have a rooting interest in prices going up. It’s normally not a good sign of journalism when you’re rooting for an outcome.”

However, the devoutly conservative WebProNews blares, “Fox Business Channel Getting Positve Reviews.” Despite using the plural “Reviews,” the WebPro article only cited one from AP, and that review was hardly a vote of confidence:

“They went on the air, played it straight and people were giving information whenever I tuned in – that’s about as successful as you can be on your first day,”

Further diluting the WebPro case is the fact that the Syracuse University professor quoted above, Robert Thompson, was also quoted in the Reuters article saying:

“I don’t think this will change the entire landscape of American TV as we know it. So far, this morning, it’s not been terribly exciting.”

Not an auspicious week for the fledgling network. But one thing we know about Murdoch is that he is more than willing to wait out tough spots and to deficit finance operations pretty much indefinitely. FNC was in the red for the majority of its short lifespan, and the New York Post has lost money for as long as Murdoch has owned it. If it costs him money to spread his propaganda, he’s got it, and he’ll spend it.

That’s why the monopolistic media environment in this country is so dangerous. We have billionaire moguls who concentrate power and exploit it to advance their agenda. In Murdoch’s case, he will even use soft-core titillation and America’s pride to manipulate public opinion. And that’s why it is so important to Stop Big Media from gaining even more power courtesy of the FCC’s proposed new ownership rules.