UH-OH: GOP Oversight Committee Chair on Fox News Fears a Weather Balloon is a Chinese Bioweapon

Among the many imminent threats to the national security of the United States, none have a greater potential for harm than the Republican Party. Particularly as it is presently transfixed by Donald Trump and his uniquely anti-American brand of ignorance, divisiveness, hostility, and egomaniacal self-exaltation.

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Republican Virus

On Friday morning the latest totally manufactured pseudo-scandal roiling the Biden administration was reported by the nervous nellies of the media. It featured a hot air balloon that was spotted at a high altitude above the plains of Montana. It was quickly accused of being a Chinese aircraft sent to spy on the United States. Never mind that China conceded that it belonged to them and was simply a wayward weather balloon.

Without hesitation, Fox News sprung into action contacting Republican Rep. James Comer (R-Balloon Boy), the new chairman of the House Oversight Committee, to get his assuredly informed and unbiased appraisal of the hovering hazard. Comer, it should be noted, is the Republican Party’s lead persecutor of President Biden, with a perverse emphasis on his son, Hunter. Comer plans to turn the Committee into a dedicated political harassment panel with the help of the GOP’s Ministry of Propaganda, Fox News.

RELATED: It’s Hunter Time: GOP Leaders are Putting Fox News First By Implementing the Hannity Agenda

Comer was a guest on Fox News Friday morning to float typically bizarre conspiracy theories about the aberrant balloon. Fox’s Harris Faulkner asked Comer about the balloon, alarmed that it is “the size of three buses now, that China says was taken by wind – wind that we can’t substantiate.” Surely Comer will get to the bottom of the unsubstantiated wind controversy. In the meantime, he replied to Faulkner’s query saying…

“Well, I have concern that this is gonna be another example of the Biden administration’s weakness on a national scale. I mean, you look at what happened in Afghanistan. […] My concern is that the federal government obviously doesn’t know what’s in that balloon. Is that bioweapons in that balloon? Did that balloon take off from Wuhan.”

Exactly! This is no different than what happened in Afghanistan when a lone terrorist blew himself up, killing dozens of innocent Afghanis and thirteen American soldiers. And even though he has absolutely zero evidence of any clandestine plot, Comer speculates that the balloon 80,000 feet in the air contains deadly toxins because China is so eager to start a global war with the United States.

For the record, CNN did what Comer couldn’t be bothered to do to find out more about this looming threat. They spoke to a Pentagon official who put the situation into perspective:

“Why not shoot it down? We have to do the risk-reward here,” the official said. “So the first question is, does it pose a threat, a physical kinetic threat, to individuals in the United States in the US homeland? Our assessment is it does not. Does it pose a threat to civilian aviation? Our assessment is it does not. Does it pose a significantly enhanced threat on the intelligence side? Our best assessment right now is that it does not. So given that profile, we assess the risk of downing it, even if the probability is low in a sparsely populated area of the debris falling and hurting someone or damaging property, that it wasn’t worth it.”

Not one to sit out an opportunity to hog the spotlight of any media hysteria, Donald Trump weighed in with his customary abundance of insight and wisdom. In a posting on his floundering Twitter ripoff, Truth Social, Trump bellowed…

“SHOOT DOWN THE BALLOON!”

Yep. That was the whole statement. And it makes perfect sense. Because what better solution could there be than to shoot down a balloon that he suspects contains deadly toxins, so that it falls onto innocent Americans on the ground? Or at the very least, spreads the poison throughout the region by unsubstantiated, but surely Chinese-affiliated, winds.

These military geniuses aren’t crazy at all, are they? And since the balloon flew over Canada on its way to the U.S., perhaps we should take Tucker Carlson’s advice more seriously…

SEE THIS: Tucker Carlson Wants the U.S. to Invade Canada to ‘Liberate’ it So it Doesn’t ‘Become Cuba’

America can feel confidant that their nation is being secured by people like Comer and Trump and the Republican Party. Now they don’t have to worry that China is attacking the U.S. with balloons or other party favors. They don’t have to wonder if those balloons are carrying viruses invented by the evil Dr. Fauci, or cash to payoff Hunter Biden, or the classified documents stolen by Barack Obama’s “Deep State” militia. It’s comforting to know that we can all rest easier now that these brainiacs are allegedly in charge.

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