The election gods may be smiling on Democrats next year. During an interview on Sean Hannity’s radio program yesterday, he asked Sarah Palin whether she would consider running for the senate in Alaska. Palin, in her version of run-on, word-salad English, mumbled something about Washington needing new blood. As usual, there is no better way to convey Palin’s message than to let her speak for herself:

“I’ve considered it because people have requested me considering it. But I’m still waiting to see what the lineup will be and hoping, there again, that there will be some new blood, new energy, not just picking from the same old politicians in the states that come from the same political families that have reigned up there for so many years because too many of them have been part of the problem.

“Any American with a heart for service has to always have in the back of their mind that they would do anything, everything that they could to help the cause, even if it’s something that doesn’t look necessarily appealing, or necessarily fitting in with the conventional plan that they would try to orchestrate for themselves and their families, I along with anybody would have to say that I would do whatever I could to help, and if that was part of that help it would have to be considered.”

And who can forget how devoted Palin was to helping when she quit her job as governor barely half way through her first term so that she could pound fish and shoot caribou on cable TV? Clearly she has demonstrated that she is an American with a heart for service, so long as that service involves lining her pockets and doesn’t require any actual work.

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If the people of Alaska would seriously consider voting for someone who previously betrayed her promise to work on their behalf after begging for their support, then Alaskans will deserve the ineffectiveness and incompetence they would get from Sarah Palin. But the nation’s comedians would get a goldmine of new material that could help to reduce our political satire deficit.

Not to worry, though. There is virtually no chance that Palin will throw her tea bag festooned hat in the ring. In a poll earlier this year Alaskans voiced their deep disapproval of Palin. She would lose by a 16 point margin to Democratic incumbent Mark Begich (54-38), and her appeal in the state is dismal with only 34% of voters viewing her positively to 59% who have a negative opinion her.

Furthermore, Palin is famously averse to doing any real work when sponging off of her deluded followers will net her more income. It’s much easier to peddle ghost-written books and make a fool of yourself on cable reality shows than to actually study the law and build the legislative coalitions required to get a bill passed in congress.

What’s more, Palin just signed a new contract with Fox News and they are not likely to appreciate it if she were to bail out after they were kind enough to rescue her from obscurity. Even though Fox has a history of employing Republicans who are actively running for office, Palin’s pattern is to pretend that she is a candidate for something in order to keep people talking about her. Without such speculation there is really no reason to pay her any attention. It isn’t like she has anything newsworthy to say about any subject. So if she can keep pundits tongues wagging with phony hints of candidacies that never materialize, that’s what she’ll do. But why anyone cares about that is also a mystery.

In her appearance at Ralph Reed’s version of a Taliban revival meeting (aka the Faith and Freedom conference), Sarah Palin gave us a glimpse of American foreign policy if it were developed by a lobotomized ferret.

Most of her address sounded like a loser on Last Comic Standing. She made jokes about protesters driving Chevy Volts, Obama voters being “knuckleheads,” and “pot-smoking deadbeat Bostonian” terrorists,” She even attempted an impression of Amy Poehler’s SNL Weekend Update anchor. Her punch lines included hilarious references to victims of terror in Boston and Ft. Hood. What could be funnier? Plus, she reprised her classic material about health care death panels and thousands of armed IRS agents (both of those issues have been definitively debunked and relegated to the fringiest conspiracy kooks).

Eventually she reached the portion of her address that dealt with foreign policy, and she did not disappoint – so long as you expected cartoonish, bumper sticker analysis that insults leaders and offends allies. Here is Palin’s approach to the crisis in Syria:

“I say, until we know what we’re doing, until we have a commander and chief who knows what he’s doing, well, in these radical Islamic countries, who aren’t even respecting basic human rights, where both sides are slaughtering each other as they scream over an arbitrary red line, ‘Allah Akbar,’ I say until we have someone who knows what they’re doing, I say let Allah sort it out.”

The tragic events in Syria are not material for a comedy routine. More than 90,000 people have been killed, and a million more are refugees who have been driven from their homes and country. To cavalierly suggest that the killing should continue and that the U.S. should be content to sit on the sidelines and ignore our national interests in peace and democracy for the region, is irresponsible in the extreme. Neither the brutal dictatorship of Assad, nor the ascension of radical Islamists, would advance the interests of the U.S. But that is what Palin is advocating. Contrary to her idiotic and dangerous indifference, America needs to be engaged with allies who share our objectives. Syria is a critical player in the region and is presently aligned with provocateurs like Iran and Hezbollah. To miss this opportunity to forge a new alignment that inures to our benefit would be foolish. Yet that is Palin’s approach – an approach that sometimes doesn’t sound all that different the one proffered by Al Qaeda’s fundamentalists:

“We’d do well to re-dedicate ourselves to our one true heavenly father. Because we’re not gonna come up in our own simple minds with the solutions. The challenges are too big.”

That’s the prefect summation for the Palin Doctrine. She admits that she has a simple mind that is incapable of solving complex problems. And she defers any action to a supreme being who, if you believe people like Palin, has already demonstrated that he isn’t averse to snuffing out the lives of the innocent in Syria, Iraq, or the World Trade Center.

If you think you can stand twenty-four minutes of Palin’s ear-piercing, high-pitched squeal, here is the whole video. I assume no responsibility for your aural health, broken vases, or the holes you may punch in the wall.