FLASHBACK: Glenn Beck’s Armageddon Prediction For August 22, 2006

Posted by on May 21, 2011 at 10:49 pm. 1 Comments :

Having survived the Rapture of May 2011, let’s take a look back at an End Times prediction by evanga-pundit Glenn Beck from 2006:

Look, everybody is talking about politics today, and we will, too, later on in the program. But first, I want to talk about something much more important. August 22nd — it is the day that Israel might be wiped off the map, leading to all-out Armageddon.

August 22nd could be the day that makes people who are the most skeptical about my World War III theory say, “Holy mother of God, what’s happening?” August 22nd could be the day that agnostics get down on one knee and start to pray, “Sweet Jesus, are you coming today?”

What I’m about to tell you nobody else is going to tell you. Honestly, it gave me great pause today, because it’s verging on the edge of insanity. It really is. With that being said, the source is so good there’s no way I can’t tell you this news.

Let me make this clear. This is not my theory, and I hope that it’s wrong. Princeton University’s Professor Bernard Lewis, this guy, look him up. He has been called the most influential post-war historian of Islam and the Middle East. He is suggesting that Iran’s Islamic end-of-times prophecies could be fulfilled on August 22nd. This August 22nd, 13 days from now.

August 22nd is, in the Islamic calendar, the date that Saladin, a 12th-century Muslim warrior, entered and conquered Jerusalem. It is also the date when Mohammed flew up to the furthest mosque, a.k.a. Jerusalem, then to heaven and then back again.

So to Muslims, I guess, August 22nd is like Christmas and Thanksgiving and New Year’s all rolled up into one. Here’s where it gets truly frightening: My theory all along has been that Iran has caused the current chaos in the Middle East to divert attention away from their nuclear program and stall for time.

President Ahmadinejad has repeatedly stated that he wants to personally bring back the 12th imam by destroying Israel. That’s Armageddon.

With that in mind, what must Beck be thinking by scheduling his upcoming event in Jerusalem for August 24? Does he still think the date is significant? Is he being deliberately provocative? Does he think he can launch the Apocalypse himself? After all, he has said of this event that “the very gates of Hell are going to open up against us.” and that “this may be it for our generation or for all mankind.”

I don’t know, I’m just asking. Have a nice summer.

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Join Glenn Beck In Jerusalem For A Special Presentation of Armageddon

Posted by on May 20, 2011 at 5:30 pm. 15 Comments :


[Below are excerpts from Glenn Beck’s VISIT JERUSALEM web site. You can read these selected segments here or click the link above for the complete experience.]

Join Glenn In Jerusalem
Coming this August, Glenn Beck is inviting you to join him on a once-in-a-lifetime pilgrimage to the holiest of lands – ISRAEL.

If you listen to Glenn on the radio, or watch him on TV, you already know that he is a stalwart supporter of the people and nation of Israel, and their role in the fate of mankind. He is an almost solitary voice advocating for a stronger partnership with the United States and in opposition to any proposal that would recognize the sovereignty of the Palestinian heathens occupying Israel’s West Bank and Gaza Strip.

Restoring CourageGlenn knows that Israel is an essential component of God’s plan for the world. He knows that without Israel there will be no Apocalypse. Therefore it is a vital duty for all Christians to protect Israel so that it can be destroyed and God can raise the faithful up to Heaven.

Glenn stands alone in his commitment to the glory of God and his Divine Will. He takes pride in his condemnation of apostate Jews like Nazi-collaborator George Soros. He courageously took on the Jewish Reform movement (the largest denomination of Jews in America) and exposed them as being no different than radical Islamists. He has featured books by renowned scholars like Elizabeth Dilling despite critics who would snub her writing just because of her overt anti-Semitism and Nazi sympathies.

Yes, Glenn stands alone, but he stands for you. And this is your chance to stand with Glenn, and therefore with God. There’s going to be a lot of standing going on. So know where you stand and what you stand for and where God wants you to stand and what your standing is in His plan. Because God won’t stand for anything less.

Why Restore Courage?
Last August Glenn held a rally in Washington, D.C. to Restore Honor. Before that amazing day there was precious little honor to be found. Now just look at all the honor overgrowing America like a hormonal kudzu. Now Glenn has recognized the critical absence of courage here at home and in the Mid-east’s notoriously coward-ridden nation of Israel. But Glenn, having received instructions from God, is here to Restore Courage or die trying. Here is what Glenn has had to say about this divine mission on which he is about to embark:

  • When I first had this idea, what I saw in my head was a global shockwave. It will ripple across the earth.
  • Possibly for the first time in man’s history, God will remember and make note of what we do there.
  • This is a life-changing, life-altering event.
  • This will be a pinnacle moment in your life. It will define you. In the end it will define you.
  • I want you to know, the very gates of Hell are going to open up against us.
  • It will be expensive to get there. It might be dangerous.
  • Will my event hurt foreign policy of the U.S.? I damn well hope so now.
  • If Israel falls the western way of life falls. That’s not hyperbole.
  • This may be it for our generation or for all mankind.
  • I will stand, I will speak, and in the end, if it be His will, I will die right alongside my brother.

It could not be any clearer. This is a holy pilgrimage to Heaven’s doorstep. This is your opportunity stand with Glenn as he is crucified before the all-seeing eye of television. Yes, you can be there with him as history is made, and maybe ended.


[There’s More! Click here to go to the VISIT JERUSALEM web site for complete details. You will learn about Glenn’s guests and sponsors and what it will set you back to attend. Share it with your friends and family, and conceal from that guy down the street that you never really liked.]


Fox News’ George Soros Conspiracy Continues To Crumble

Posted by on May 19, 2011 at 2:23 pm. 5 Comments :

Last week Fox News published an article by Dan Gainor of the ultra-rightist Media Research Center that purported to reveal a web of connections between George Soros and the mainstream media. The article failed completely in its mission. As I wrote last week:

“On the Fox News web site today, Dan Gainor, a VP at the ultra-conservative Media Research Center, wrote an op-ed that asked, ‘Why Don’t We Hear About Soros’ Ties to Over 30 Major News Organizations?’ The answer, as it turns out, is because there aren’t any such ties. […] Gainor has utterly failed to support his thesis. Not only does Soros have no control over these organizations, but they aren’t even the big media powers Gainor describes them as.”

Today Fox News published part two of Gainor’s series. Not only did he continue to fire blanks, he actually revealed information that implicates the right in a vast media conspiracy.

Most of part two was a rehashing of part one with even fewer specifics. The threads in the alleged web Gainor is weaving merely tie Soros to some media organizations that are also funded by many other people and groups who seek to advance the state of independent journalism. And while pointing out the connections, Gainor never discloses anything sordid resulting from them. There isn’t even a hint of some effort to slant their reporting or engage in biased coverage. So the only conclusion is that Soros donated money to a number of reputable organizations that have demonstrated their integrity and that Gainor is apparently opposed to that, as are most conservatives. The last thing they want is news that is truly fair and balanced.

One area where he provided some new information was in identifying a few more of the “major” news organizations for whom Soros is supposedly the puppet master. There is just one thing wrong with these revelations. They are also affiliated with news organizations on the right:

  • The Center for Investigative Reporting lists Rupert Murdoch’s Times of London as an affiliate.
  • The Center for Public Integrity is connected to the Associated Press, of which Murdoch is a member of the board of directors.
  • The Lens is affiliated with WVUE-TV in New Orleans, a FOX affiliate.
  • The Texas Tribune’s founding investor was T. Boone Pickens.

That last affiliation is particularly notable because Gainor is the “Boone Pickens Fellow” for the Media Research Center, and that Pickens himself is an MRC trustee. So Gainor’s job at the MRC was endowed by the same man who bankrolled one of the media enterprises connected to Soros and that Gainor says is irredeemably leftist.

Uh oh. That means that Gainor himself is connected to Soros and this whole series of articles must be a plot orchestrated by Pickens, Murdoch, Soros, and probably President Obama and the Muslim Brotherhood. Be afraid.


Bernie Sanders Ambushed By Ignorant Human Events Editor

Posted by on May 19, 2011 at 11:36 am. 13 Comments :

Sen. Bernie Sanders appeared at a signing event recently for his book “The Speech: A Historic Filibuster on Corporate Greed and the Decline of Our Middle Class.” In accord with the neanderthal tactics of right-wing journalism, Jason Mattera showed up pretending to be an autograph seeker.

Mattera is not your run of the mill, immature, ignorant, Internet videographer (ala James O’Keefe). He is also the editor of the uber-con magazine, Human Events. Mattera proudly posted the video of his encounter with Sanders apparently with the impression that he proved some point:

In this video, Mattera embarrasses himself by asking a singularly stupid question: “How does an avowed socialist go about selling a book?” What Mattera fails to understand is that there is no prohibition on bringing books or other products to market under many implementations of socialism. Is he really so dumb that he is unaware of the thousands of books available by and about socialists? Perhaps someone should turn the tables and ask Mattera “How does an avowed capitalist go about collecting Social Security, attending college on GI or Pell grants, driving on interstate highways, or eating food that has been inspected by the USDA?”

Then Mattera lands what he seems to believe is his finishing blow by asking where the profits from the book will go. Sanders advises him that they will be donated to the children of Vermont. But Mattera snidely implies that this isn’t true because the charity hasn’t been selected yet.

All in all, Mattera’s video shows him to be uninformed and arrogantly dismissive. Yet he is so proud of his shoddy performance he posts it publicly for all to see and laugh at. The truly sad part of this is that since he is the editor of Human Events, how much more out of touch are the losers he supervises?


Lessons In Right-Wing Media Relations

Posted by on May 19, 2011 at 1:55 am. 4 Comments :

If you were paying attention to conservatives in the press today you would have received an advanced course their trademark obfuscation and flim flam.

Let’s begin with Newt Gingrich’s masterful recovery from an embarrassing fumble. After dissing fellow Republican Paul Ryan’s budget proposal as “radical, right-wing, social engineering,” Gingrich attempted to blame the media for quoting him correctly. When that fell flat he pivoted to a full mea culpa, apologizing publicly and personally to Ryan. But the piece de resistance was his declaration to Greta Van Susteren on Fox News that “any ad which quotes what I said on Sunday is a falsehood.”

Bravo. Gingrich has just invented the “if you quote me you’re lying” defense. It is so brilliant that even after he is ridiculed for it he can use it again to warn the media not to quote what he told Susteren either. This is a groundbreaking achievement in PR spin that even surpasses Jon Kyl’s infamous “not intended to be a factual statement.”

Jerome CorsiNow let’s move on to Jerome Corsi, author of a book with the world’s worst release timing: “Where’s the Birth Certificate? The Case that Barack Obama is Not Eligible to be President” This insightful work of political intrigue just happened to come out shortly after the titular certificate of birth (not that the question hadn’t been answered years ago anyway). But to make matters worse, Corsi was bumped from the Sean Hannity show reportedly because the “issue is no longer in the news cycle.” That’s right-wing talk for “we can’t sell this bullshit anymore.” Watch your head, Corsi, because when you’ve lost Hannity, the next stop in that barrel is the bottom.

Finally we have the queen of media whimpering, Sarah Palin. Despite having sworn off of criticizing the press weeks ago, her bashing continues unabated. In an interview with Sean Hannity (who apparently thinks that she is still in the news cycle) she attempts to defend Gingrich and advises her conservative comrades to steer clear of the “lame-stream media.”

“Candidates need to get their message out through the new social media. Don’t even participate in that goofy game that’s been played for too many years with the leftist lame-stream media.”

I couldn’t agree more. Republicans and other conservatives should sequester themselves in the realm of social media, talk radio, and Fox News. No more pandering to Meet the Press or the Washington Post. Just update your Facebook status with a policy paper on national security. Then Tweet your positions on the economy and health care. I’m sure any respectable Republican could do that in 140 characters or less given that they don’t have to worry about using facts or reason.

In order for this to work, however, the media has to reciprocate. For as long as Palin and other right-wingers confine themselves to conservative media and Internet platforms they control, the rest of the press must ignore them right back. That means no coverage of their Tweets or Facebook posts or interviews with Rush Limbaugh or Steve Doocy. Although exceptions may be granted for mocking the inevitable gaffes and malaprops they will generously provide.

If the right would actually follow through with this threat, and the “lame-streamers” could resist the temptation to hype every belch some celebrity politician emits, watching TV and reading newspapers could become a lot more enjoyable and educational.


Noxious Irritation: Andrew Breitbart’s True Hollywood Horror Story

Posted by on May 16, 2011 at 5:58 pm. 12 Comments :

How Hollywood Drove Andrew Breitbart To The Mad Hater’s Tea Party

Andrew BreitbartAndrew Breitbart just released his new book, “Righteous Indignation,” that opens a window into his innermost impulses and ambitions. It reveals the complex circuitry of his character that succeeds in being both self-loathing and Narcissistic. Breitbart takes us on his journey from unrequited Hollywood wannabe to Tea Party overlord and along the way establishes that his book might better have been titled “Noxious Irritation.” If anything, his indignation is aimed at a community that he desperately wanted to be a part of, but which wanted nothing to do with him.

Growing up in the Tinseltown suburb of Brentwood, Breitbart developed an early obsession with show business and celebrity. He writes with a palpable glee of having had the same tennis instructor as Farrah Fawcett and Arnold Schwarzenegger. The most trivial association with stardom sent him twirling, as when his family, “once rented out our motor home to John Ritter from Three’s Company. I bragged about it in school for weeks.” But despite his glamorous aspirations, the first forty pages of the book describe a young man seething with self-hatred. And judging from his own account it was deserved. He paints a picture of himself as an ignorant, alcoholic, loser.

Contine reading →

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Glenn Beck’s Daughter

Posted by on May 16, 2011 at 4:27 pm. 8 Comments :

Glenn Beck's DaughterAfter much searching I have been able to acquire a picture of Glenn Beck’s daughter. I am making this picture available in the spirit of full transparency, although I hope she never wears any clothing that is actually transparent. Just look at her. Calling her a pig would be insulting to pigs. This is someone who could be justifiably confined to a crawl space in the attic to protect the sensitivities of the rest of civil society.

That said…Please rest assured that the foregoing was meant to be facetious in order to make a point. Last week there was a very public feud between Glenn Beck and the McCain family. It erupted after Beck broadcast a prolonged and insulting segment wherein he mocked John McCain’s daughter for appearing in a public service announcement to bring awareness to skin cancer, which both of her parents have had.

Beck spent much of the segment pretending to vomit into a trash can at the sight of Meghan McCain. He and his radio zoo cronies relentlessly made fun of her appearance without ever acknowledging that she was doing this on behalf of an important charitable cause.

This isn’t the first time Beck has ventured into insulting the children of his political opponents. He and his crew previously attacked the intelligence of President Obama’s eleven year old daughter, Malia, calling her stupid. The outcry following that incident resulted in Beck making this apology:

“I broke my own rule about leaving kids out of political debates. The children of public figures should be left on the sidelines. It was a stupid mistake and I apologize – and as a dad I should have known better.”

Exactly. As a dad, how would he feel if his daughter was mocked and characterized as ugly, fat, and stupid? How would he feel if Keith Olbermann pretended to vomit at the sight of his daughter? And how can he be excused for having done so after his prior antics for which he was forced to apologize?

Remember, this is the same man who once called, on the air, the wife of one of his radio competitors two days after she had suffered a miscarriage and “joked” that “he [her husband] can’t do anything right.”

Meghan wrote a brilliant response to Beck that he ought to take to heart, if he has one. Noting that he has daughters of his own she wrote that…

“There really is no need to make something like my participation in a skin-cancer PSA into a sexist rant about my weight and physical appearance, because I’m going to let you in on a little secret, Glenn: you are the only one who looks bad in this scenario.”

Glenn Beck likes to portray himself as a devout Christian who advocates standing for strong family values. Apparently his idea of values includes repulsive and hurtful insults to people who are performing actual acts of charity. I hope he recalls this incident when one of his daughters comes home crying because they were made to feel ugly by some jerkwad who is just like their dad. But I doubt he has learned anything because he went on Bill O’Reilly’s show Friday and refused to apologize.


The Adam Carolla, Andrew Breitbart Racism Hour

Posted by on May 15, 2011 at 2:50 pm. 33 Comments :

Adam Carolla hates Los Angeles. He says so fervently and repeatedly in his latest podcast. It is a vulgarity-laced rant that excoriates Latinos, unions, and liberal celebrities and politicians. And his guest for the hour is the chronically choleric Andrew Breitbart who agrees with every word. To illustrate his hatred, Carolla offers this story, wherein he exposes his overt prejudice and ignorance:

Carolla: On one side of the stretch of Forest Lawn Drive are all the illegals. And they hang out there and they sell flowers to people who are going to Forest Lawn [Cemetery]. And, of course, next to where they’re selling all their stuff is trash. Trash everywhere. Fast food wrappers from the food they eat. Boxes from the boxes they use and then discard. There’s no trash cans put along there. It’s a bunch of illegals, standing around, selling things without a license, without permits, without anything.

Of course, Carolla has no idea whether the entrepreneurs he saw were documented or not. He didn’t pull over and ask to see any ID or business permits. He simply spewed his racist rage based on their appearance alone. That is racism by definition.

Andrew Breitbart wholeheartedly agrees with Carolla’s assessment of Los Angeles and its people, calling all of California “the suckiest place.” He tells Carolla that his views would help him were he to be a Republican candidate for office. That’s probably true. Then Breitbart offers a preemptive defense against any well-deserved accusations of racism:

Breitbart: If you tell the truth … You’re not allowed to say that story. If Media Matters or some left-wing group were to take what you just said, I guarantee they would distill it down to “This guy’s a racist.” They’re not listening to the logic in it.

Considered it distilled by this left-winger. Breitbart likes to complain about being called a racist, but he hasn’t yet figured out that the best way to avoid that is to stop being one. The entirety of the logic in Carolla’s rant comes down to “brown skin = illegal.” Breitbart also defended himself against charges of racism by confessing that, as a teenager, he jacked-off to pictures of Maria Conchita Alonso and Lisa Bonet. Yeah, that proves it. Even Carolla saw the disgusting fallacy of that remark:

Breitbart: Can I prove that I’m not a racist toward Hispanics? Did you ever see Moscow on the Hudson? Remember Maria Conchita Alonso in that? The things I did to myself as a teenager prove that I’m not a racist.

Carolla: But you’re like one of those plantation owners who’s having sex with their slaves.

They just laughed that one off and proceeded to imagine how much better things would be if they moved to Texas or New Zealand to get away from the more ethnically diverse culture of Southern California. The whole hour was a display of small-minded bigotry and crass attempts at humor. It’s the sort of show that thinks that calling Congresswoman Maxine Waters a cunt is funny.

I don’t listen to Carolla’s program, and suffice it to say I’m not going to be rushing to join his current audience of putrid preteens and grossly immature adults like Breitbart. But in the future I may pay more attention to his venomous spewing so that he can be exposed as the vile bigot that he is.


Glenn Beck Has Seen The Finger Of God

Posted by on May 13, 2011 at 2:14 pm. 6 Comments :

As his tenure at Fox News winds to a close, Glenn Beck’s Messianic delusions are escalating beyond imagination.

Beck has long seen himself as the Lord’s messenger. After visiting the Vatican last year he returned with a story of a mysterious man who told him that “we know who you are. What you’re doing is wildly important.” He later told his radio congregation that “God is giving a plan, I think, to me that is not really a plan.” Whatever that means.

Today Beck revealed another encounter with the Almighty:


“I’m going to invite you to join me on a journey that will be recorded in the annals of history. It will be recorded and remembered. […] You are going to see miracles in your lifetime. I believe I have seen the finger of God. I believe that in the coming days you will see the entire of arm of God.”

The entire arm? All the way to the pit? Somehow I think it’s more likely that God is going to reveal his foot to Beck’s ass. However, I do believe that God has given Beck the finger. In fact, God has smited him mightily just as the Bible says. The signs are clear and cannot be ignored. God is pissed! He has said so unambiguously. Deuteronomy 28:27-29, describes the punishment from the Lord if you should fail to follow his laws:

27: The LORD will smite thee with the botch of Egypt, and with the emerods, and with the scab, and with the itch, whereof thou canst not be healed.
28: The LORD shall smite thee with madness, and blindness, and astonishment of heart.
29: And thou shalt grope at noonday, as the blind gropeth in darkness, and thou shalt not prosper in thy ways: and thou shalt be only oppressed and spoiled evermore, and no man shall save thee.

We hardly need to speak of Egypt and how badly Beck botched that. The emerods (or hemorrhoids) he has already had, and it nearly killed him. The potential blindness he announced tearfully last year. The madness is self evident. Even his prosperity is being plundered as his television program signs off and numerous radio stations have canceled his show.

Despite the Lord’s pleading and obvious signs, Beck has persisted in his evil ways, forcing God to resort to a vulgarity that every human ought to understand. When God flips you the bird, you should take notice. But Beck is probably too blinded by his own divine Narcissism that this too will go right over his head.


Megyn Kelly and Fox News Helped Sen. Ensign Cover-Up His Crimes

Posted by on May 13, 2011 at 9:52 am. 13 Comments :

Nevada Senator John Ensign resigned from the Senate last week, but his troubles may not end there. The New York Times is reporting that the results of a Senate Ethics Committee investigation may leave Ensign liable for charges of obstructing an FEC investigation, violating federal lobbying bans, and making unlawful payments to the husband of his congressional aide with whom he was having an affair – among other things.

However, any investigation of this matter needs to include possible interference on the part of Fox News and Glenn Beck-wannabe, Megyn Kelly. There is evidence that Kelly, who received a letter from Doug Hampton revealing Ensign’s infidelity, warned Ensign that the news was about to come out rather than reporting on it. As I wrote on June 19, 2009:

“Fox News knew of Ensign’s infidelity five days before Ensign came forward. They got the information from the husband of Ensign’s mistress. That’s a pretty good source, especially when he asserts that he had corroborating evidence.”

First Fox denied having received any letter. Then they admitted that they had received the letter a day before the news broke. Then a FedEx receipt revealed that they had received the letter three days earlier. And Fox broadcast no stories about the Ensign affair during any of that time, or even for several days after.

When Ensign came forward to confess his sins, he told the press that he was doing so because the story was about to come out in the media. So the question is: did he learn that from Megyn Kelly?

The evidence strongly suggests that Kelly tipped Ensign off and set the stage for his announcement. Then she and Fox kept the story quiet in the days that followed. That is not the behavior of a “news” network. It is the behavior of an accomplice.

[Update 5/16/11] The Senate Ethics Committee report suggests former senator (and current GOP presidential candidate) Rick Santorum may have played a role in tipping off Ensign. If true, that does not mean that Kelly didn’t also give a head’s up to Ensign. And it certainly doesn’t explain the changing stories about when she received Hampton’s letter.

There is also the matter of Ensign’s reason for going public (that he was told that the media was going to break the news of the affair). That’s an alert that is more likely to come from Kelly (a Fox anchor) than from Santorum (a former senate colleague). However, it should be noted that Santorum was also a Fox News contributor at the time he is alleged to have tipped off Ensign. So Fox is entangled in this business no matter what.