Humor

Trump’s Live-Bleating of Biden’s State of the Union Address Was Predictably Petty and Pathetic

Posted by on March 8, 2024 at 1:14 pm. 1 Comments :

President Biden’s State of the Union Address has been widely reviewed as a smashing success. He covered everything from the booming economy, to record job creation, to immigration, to abortion and reproductive rights, to gun safety reforms, to climate change, to foreign aid in Ukraine and Israel, to preserving democracy and civil liberties, and so much more.

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Donald Trump, Presidenty

Biden spoke for about an hour, and his performance is being described as “fiery” and “forceful.” He was so good that Republicans have abandoned their childish taunts about his age and mental acuity, and replaced them with asinine allegations that he was on drugs. Sean Hannity and others took to calling him “Jacked-Up joe.”

The Biden campaign should have “Jacked-Up joe” t-shirts by the end of the week. They have been pretty good at trolling Trump and the MAGA crowd.

SEE ALSO: DARK BRANDON STRIKES AGAIN: Biden Drops Proof of Trump’s Mental Meltdowns on Truth Social

For his part, Donald Trump engaged in a live “truthing” of the speech on his failing social media scam, Truth Social. Which reportedly was crashing throughout his rage-fest. True to form, Trump’s outbursts were utterly devoid of substance or any resemblance to reality. Although they were chock full of tastelessness inanities. What follows are just a few choice examples from among the 79 posts Trump made. And, yes, they are all real.

“The first statement that Crooked Joe Biden should make tonight when addressing the Nation is that he will immediately terminate the Witch Hunt against his Political Opponent, ME. Prosecutors and Judges have teamed up as though we were a third world nation!”
Naturally, Trump is most concerned about his own problems, rather than those of the American people. Biden appropriately chose to ignore this subject.

“Thankfully, we won’t have to be looking at RINO Mitt Romney much longer!”
Trump continues to alienate fellow Republicans who are insufficiently worshipful of him.

“Who kissed him on the cheek with lipstick? Now he’s got lipstick on his face. How stupid of her!”
It was probably George Santos, who was actually in attendance. In any case, lipstick on Biden’s face is still better than that cheesy spray tan that Trump has on his.

“His hair is much better in the front than on the back!”
So now Trump is pretending to be a fashion critic. Although hair styling is not a subject that Trump seems to know much about.

“He looks so angry when he’s talking, which is a trait of people who know they are ‘losing it.’ The anger and shouting is not helpful to bringing our Country back together!” [and] “He is so angry and crazy!”
Now this is a subject that Trump does know something about. In fact, he seems to be talking about himself.

“THE DRUGS ARE WEARING OFF!”
Here is another subject with which Trump has some experience. Just ask his doctor, Rep. Ronny Jackson, who dispensed narcotics at the White House like candy. Adderall anyone?

“He wants to take away everyone’s gun. Remember that when you go to the Voting Booth, because if I’m not elected, your guns are GONE, along with your Freedom!”
Sounds like Trump wants people to be packing heat when they vote. And Biden has been President for more than three years and no one’s guns have been confiscated. He has never advocated disarming America. He just proposed to put common sense regulations in place to stop the carnage of gun violence.

“WHAT HAPPENED TO NANCY?”
Nancy Pelosi was in the chamber watching the speech. Maybe Trump meant Nikki Haley again. A better question might be “WHAT HAPPENED TO MELANIA?”

Trump closed his tirade by saying that “This was an angry, polarizing, and hate-filled Speech.” He complained that Biden didn’t begin with remarks about the border. And he made the ludicrous claim that Biden “wants our Country to be flooded with Migrants.” Then he concluded by saying that “The Story is that he got through it, he’s still breathing, and they didn’t have to carry him out in a straitjacket.”

That’s right. Despite Trump saying that Biden can’t put two sentences together, Biden delivered a powerful speech that was well received. A post-speech poll by CNN found that 60% of those who watched it had a positive reaction. 35% reacted very positively. Also, 62% said Biden’s policies will move the U.S. in the right direction.

In addition, Trump said that Biden would not mention Laken Riley’s name (he did); that migrant crime is rampant (it’s not); and that Biden weaponized government for political purposes (that was Jim Jordan and James Comer). Those were just a few of the blatant lies Trump told. There were many more as documented in this fact-check. And he woke up Friday morning with still more lies to unload…

“Biden’s speech last night is getting ‘panned’ all over the World. Only the Radical Left lunatics are trying to make the best of it. It took him 41 minutes to talk, briefly, about Immigration and the Border, on the topic of which he was very weak. No talk of weaponization against his very calm and nice opponent. Angry as hell, this guy is a PSYCHO!”

Is there anything funnier – or more outrageously preposterous – than Donald Trump calling anyone else an “angry as hell” “PSYCHO!”? It’s textbook projection by a certified angry as hell psycho.

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President Biden is Interviewed on Late Night with Seth Meyers, But Trump, as Usual, is the Joke

Posted by on February 27, 2024 at 1:05 pm. 2 Comments :

The 2024 election cycle is in full bloom. And that means that candidates are going to be making more appearances on a variety of media, including those generally regarded as entertainment. For President Biden that means appearing on late night comedy talk shows. For Donald Trump that means getting fluffed by the likes of Sean Hannity on Fox News, which despite its name, is designated as entertainment.

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Donald Trump

On Monday night Biden made a surprise appearance on NBC’s Late Night with Seth Meyers (video below). It was the program’s 10 year anniversary special, and Meyers celebrated by bringing in the same guests that appeared on his first show, Amy Poehler and then-VP Joe Biden. It takes a certain measure of courage to engage in humorous banter with professionals, which Biden has shown frequently. Trump, on the hand, has shown only his notorious cowardice and aversion to any sort of unfriendly media.

SEE THIS: Trump Has a Fear of Comedians that’s Rooted in His Fear of Looking Like a Fool – Too Late

Biden responded to a variety of questions with humor, compassion, intelligence, and insight. He joked about “Dark Brandon” and the preposterous Taylor Swift conspiracy theories. As for Meyers, he covered some of the most pressing issues of the day. He asked Biden about the difficulties of producing bipartisan legislation; about Trump encouraging Vladimir Putin to “Do whatever the hell you want” to America’s NATO allies; about the risk to democracy in the upcoming election; and about the Israel-Hamas war.

Meyers put the Trump-fluffers on Fox News to shame, assuming they had any capacity for it. But he also gave Biden an opportunity to shine comedically. For instance, there was the following exchange concerning the ridiculously overblown age issue…

Meyers: You are currently 81 years old. All jokes aside, according to recent polling this is a real concern for American voters. How do you address that concern going forward as you come up to the 2024 election?
Biden: Well, a couple things. Number one, you got to take a look at the other guy. He’s about as old as I am, but he can’t remember his wife’s name. Number two, it’s about how old your ideas are. Look, I mean, this is a guy who wants to take us back. He wants to take us back on Roe v. Wade. He wants to take us back on a whole range of issues after 50, 60 years they have been solid American positions.

For the record, Biden’s reference to Trump forgetting Melania’s name comes from a recent Trump rally wherein he appeared to call her “Mercedes.” Meyers included that earlier in the show during his “A Closer Look” segment:

Throughout the interview, Biden wasn’t shy about criticizing Trump. Among the more pungent put-downs were his observations of Trump’s “disregard the rule of law;” his intentions to “ignore the Constitution,” his promise to “forgive” and “release” the violent January 6th insurrectionists who stormed the Capitol; and his demand that Congress kill bipartisan legislation to enhance border security and fund Israel and Ukraine in order to help Trump politically.

We can expect Trump to fly into one his typical ketchup throwing tantrums when he’s is eventually told about this. But that isn’t going to make him feel any better, nor advance his campaign to reoccupy the White House. It will just make the walls of Mar-a-Lago tastier.

UPDATE: As expected, Trump went off on Biden and Meyers, whose show he said was low-rated. But obviously Trump was watching and thought it was important enough to produce a video whining about it. This is the pathetic crybaby that the GOP is gonna nominate for president?

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Jon Stewart Mercilessly Shreds Tucker Carlson’s Vile Veneration of Vladimir Putin and Russia

Posted by on February 20, 2024 at 12:50 pm. 3 Comments :

The return of Jon Stewart to “The Daily Show” is proving to be a stark reminder of just how much the world of media satire has been missing for the past nine years. His ability to wrap fact-filled commentaries in a humorous package with biting deliveries is unparalleled in contemporary comedy.

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Jon Stewart, Donald Trump

Monday night’s episode was a perfect example of this as Stewart refocused his attention an old and pitiful adversary, Tucker Carlson. Stewart frequently creamed Carlson’s ivory tower white nationalism when he was a Fox News Trump-fluffer. And even before that, when Carlson co-hosted CNN’s Crossfire. On Monday Stewart referenced an infamous exchange from that era saying that “I know I’ve said this before, but you’re such a dick.”

WATCH THE ORIGINAL: Fox News Hack Tucker Carlson Lamely Tries to Insult Jon Stewart, Gets Another Brutal Beat Down

Stewart was not swayed by Carlson’s worshipful propaganda (video below). He reviewed Carlson’s lapdog interview of his hero, Vladimir Putin, describing his enrapt facial expression throughout as “like you’re constipated while jerking off to a Sears catalog.” Carlson spent most of his two hour audience with Putin gazing adoringly at him as he disseminated flagrantly self-serving disinformation and outright lies. None of which were challenged by Carlson.

SEE THIS: Tucker Carlson Snuggles Up to His Master, Vladimir Putin, in a Humiliating Parade of Propaganda

Stewart brutally took apart Carlson’s slobbering adoration of Russia’s subway stations and grocery stores, including his feigned surprise that the value of groceries there had “radicalized” him against U.S. leaders, whom he apparently believes set the prices for groceries. Stewart mocked Carlson saying…

“And it will radicalize you! Unless you understand basic economics. See, $104.00 for groceries sounds like a great bargain unless you realize Russians earn less than $200.00 a week. But that’s the kind of context that a — what did you call yourself earlier? — a “journalist” would have provided.

“But here’s the reality: You f*cking know all this. Because you aren’t as dumb as your face would have us believe. Perhaps if your handlers had allowed, you would have seen there was a hidden fee to your cheap groceries and orderly streets. Ask Alexei Navalny or any of his supporters.”

Whereupon Stewart played a video of Navalny mourners being harassed and arrested by Russian police, observing that “The difference between our urinal-caked, chaotic subways, and your candelabra, beautiful subways, is the literal price of freedom.” Stewart concluded by noting that to today’s right-wing Trump MAGA cult, Putin is an ally and a friend, saying “I mean liberty is nice, but have you seen Russia’s shopping carts?”

Carlson appears to be determined to prove that he is as much a Russian asset as Donald Trump. But it isn’t because of any principles that he adheres to. It’s out of the desperation that comes from being a washed up pseudo-pundit whose puerile perspectives have gotten him fired from CNN, PBS, MSNBC, and even Fox News.

So like the rest of the MAGA Republicans scrambling to avoid the inevitable anguish of irrelevancy, he’s clinging to Trump and the futile hope that such pathetic toadyism will save him. Yeah, that’ll work. Just keep hanging on and maybe you can share an apartment in Moscow with him. Or a prison cell.

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DO-NOTHING CONGRESS? The Republican House of Representatives is the Least Productive Ever

Posted by on December 21, 2023 at 2:18 pm. 4 Comments :

As 2023 draws to a close, it’s a good time to reflect on the progress – or lack thereof – made by America’s political class in Washington. This year began with the Republican Party assuming a narrow majority in the House of Representatives. They promised that they would use that status to advance an agenda that would benefit the nation and its citizens.

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Donald Trump, Congress, Mike Johnson

That promise was never fulfilled. To the contrary, Republicans managed to snag a record for passing fewer bills (20) than any Congress in modern times. But what makes that “achievement” all the more humiliating is that they seem to be proud of their ineffectualness. It’s hard to argue that they weren’t purposefully determined to be political slackers. Particularly if you listen to what they have said about themselves…

SEE THIS: GOP Wants a Government Shutdown Because ‘Most of What We Do is Bad, Hurts the American People’

Considering what Republicans proposed to do in the year leading up to their congressional majority, the country might want to count their blessings that the GOP are so inept. After assuming power, they immediately set aside the issues that they ran on, such as banning abortion, racist immigration policies, tax relief for corporations and the wealthy, befouling the planet, guns for everyone, everywhere, and manufactured outrages against buzzwords like CRT, DEI, and “wokism.”

Instead, the GOP set their sights on personal political vendettas, fighting among themselves, and running defense for Dear Leader Donald Trump. As result, they managed to pass only twenty bills, most of which were trivialities such as naming buildings. The exceptions, such as raising the debt ceiling and reducing inflation, only passed with majority Democratic support.

The year end analysis of the GOP’s pitiful performance was even recognized by Fox News, who ran a segment on what they called the “Do-Nothing Congress,” with a chyron that read “Congress Has Historically Unproductive 2023.”

However, perhaps they are being unduly harsh. The 118th Congress wasn’t entirely unproductive. In fact, they scored some notable records for a majority party in the legislature. And it’s high time we give credit where credit is due. For instance…

  • The GOP held more votes (15) to elect a Speaker (Kevin McCarthy) than ever before.
  • They nominated more Speaker candidates (Steve Scalise, Jim Jordan, Tom Emmer, Mike Johnson), after ousting their first Speaker nine months later, than any prior Congress.
  • They spent more time (three weeks) to run through those Speaker candidates before succeeding in electing an unknown backbencher (Mike Johnson) with dubious credentials.
  • They introduced more articles of impeachment (for President Biden, DHS Sec. Alejandro Mayorkas, FBI Director Chris Wray, U.S. Attorney Matthew Graves, and Attorney General Merrick Garland) than ever.
  • And they entered more dick pix (1) into the congressional record during televised hearings than any of their predecessors.

With that record of achievement, how can anyone disparage the work ethic of the Republicans currently in charge of the House? They are clearly an energetic bunch of eager beavers intent on wasting taxpayer money and smearing their political opponents with pointless probes and knee-jerk obstructionism.

Without a doubt, they have been more prolific in those endeavors than anyone who has come before them. And no one should deprive them of that “honor.” They have even made time to help Democrats produce campaign ads that illustrate just how productive they were when they held the majority…

SEE THIS: President Biden Trolls Marjorie Taylor Greene’s Hysterically Lame Swipe at Democratic Successes

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Trump is Gonna Freak Out: His Name Was Uttered Only Once By Biden in His WHCD Speech

Posted by on April 30, 2023 at 12:04 pm. 4 Comments :

One of the most remarkable things about the post-Trump era is that, despite his humiliating electoral loss, his dead weight impact on the Republican Party, and his unprecedented legal entanglements, investigations, and indictments, Donald Trump refuses to go away.

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Donald Trump, Joe Biden

The continuing presence of the Mar-All-Ego narcissist persists in haunting the American political scene, even though he has been resolutely rejected, even by Republicans.

RELATED: Americans are Unsatisfied with Politics in General, But Specifically Despise Trump and the GOP

No other former president has imposed himself on the nation like this following their term, especially if they suffered a decisive defeat for reelection. But Trump defies the norms in so many ways. Most significantly, he simply cannot stand it when he is not the center of attention. As a result, he will exploit any available measures to thrust himself into the spotlight to steal whatever focus he can from more important matters. And when he’s unsuccessful at that, it generally manifests as petty jealously and outrage.

Consequently, we can expect to see Trump’s anger erupt over his near exclusion from the remarks made at the White House Correspondents Dinner in Washington, D.C. Sunday night. President Biden gave an entertaining presentation that was at times profound and hysterical. But to Trump’s dismay, Biden only referenced the twice impeached, indicted, former reality TV game show host, one time. And even that was a throw away line about their common ages.

Referring to reports in the New York Times, the President noted a headline saying that “Biden’s advanced age is a big issue. Trump’s, however, is not.” That was just one of the jokes Biden made about his age. The only other reference to Trump didn’t mention his name at all. Alluding to Trump’s Stormy Daniels payoff, Biden said that comedian keynoter, Roy Wood, Jr. “offered me 10 bucks if I’d keep it under 10 minutes. That’s a switch, a President being offered hush money.”

That’s it. Nothing more about Trump was said in Biden’s address. However, while almost entirely ignoring Trump, Biden did get some digs in at Trump’s Ministry of Propaganda, Fox News. In addition to noting that Tucker Carlson – who was unceremoniously fired by Fox – is “finished,” Biden made these salient points (video below)…

  • It’s great the cable news networks are here tonight. MSNBC owned by NBC Universal. Fox News owned by Dominion Voting Systems.
  • With that $787 million settlement, they [Fox] are here because they couldn’t say no to a free meal.
  • I’d call Fox honest, fair, and truthful, but then I could be sued for defamation.
  • [And on a more serious note] A poison is running through our democracy and parts of the extreme press. The truth buried by lies, and lies living on as truth. Lies told for profit and power. Lies of conspiracy and malice repeated over and over again, designed to generate a cycle of anger, hate, and even violence.

SEE THIS: The Fox News 3/4 Billion Dollar Dominion Defamation Settlement is Also a Judgment Against Trump

As of this writing, Trump hasn’t said anything about his absence from the festivities. He may still be nursing his despair or fueling his fury. But he is undoubtedly vexed. It’s possible he might just express it by lashing out at something unrelated to change the subject. He has already posted 48 comments on his floundering Twitter ripoff, Truth Social this morning. Most of them about his most feared opponent, Ron DeSantis. So he is apparently trying to flood the zone with bullshit as he weeps over being left out.

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Saturday Night Live Tears Up Trump’s Ludicrous Lie that Everyone He Meets is Crying

Posted by on April 16, 2023 at 11:23 am. 2 Comments :

The single most reliable characteristic of Donald Trump is that whenever he speaks is almost certainly lying. His lies generally involve insults aimed at his foes, distortions of his political “accomplishments,” examples of his blithering ignorance, and always hysterically exaggerated exaltations of himself.

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Fox News, Tucker Carlson, Donald Trump

Last week Trump visited Fox News for a tongue-bathing session with Tucker Carlson. This was Carlson’s penance for expressing his true feelings about Trump in internal communications acquired by Dominion Voting Systems in their billion dollar defamation lawsuit against Fox News. In those private discussions Carlson told his Fox confederates that Trump is a “demonic Force” who he “hates passionately.”

SEE THIS: In Dominion v Fox News, Network Cries ‘We Can’t Make People Think We’ve Turned Against Trump’

In lieu of digging up his rosary and reciting a thousand “Hail Trump’s,” Carlson pitched him a few soft (and well-tanned) balls and gazed adoringly while Trump rambled incoherently for an hour.

The entire interview was a rehashing of every bit of nonsense Trump has been disgorging for months and years. And it included one of his favorite venerations of himself: The fatuous fantasy that his cult disciples are frequently reduced to tears whenever they are in his putrid presence. Describing the scene when he appeared in a New York courtroom to be arraigned on 34 felony counts of fraud, Trump said that…

“When I went to the courthouse, which is also a prison in a sense, they signed me in and I’ll tell you, people were crying. People that work there, professionally work there. They have no problems putting in murderers, and they see everybody, it’s a tough, tough place. And they were crying. They were actually crying. They said, ‘I’m sorry.'”

First of all, a courtroom is not in any sense a prison. Although it isn’t surprising that Trump would feel trapped there. But more to the point, Trump’s wild assertion that court staffers were crying and apologizing – which was refuted by witnesses – is just plain preposterous. And among those who recognized that fact were the folks at Saturday Night Live. SNL’s “Weekend Update” segment featured “anchor” Colin Jost running a compilation of Trump’s prior claims that he makes people sob, and asking “Why is everyone in Trump’s stories always crying?” Jost followed that up by pointing out that…

“You’re bragging that when people see you they just burst into tears? Because it never sounds like excited crying like when teenagers see BTS. It sounds more like scared crying like when hostages see Jigsaw.”

It’s remarkable that Trump can say these things with a straight face, confidant that anyone would believe him. But it’s even more remarkable that there are people who actually do believe him. That’s the power, harm, and danger of cults. And clearly Carlson has joined the Trump Cult as he made no effort to ascertain the validity of Trump’s boasting. In fact, he is so thoroughly indoctrinated that he has even advocated a violent response to Trump’s having been indicted.

SEE THIS: Tucker Carlson Warns that Trump’s Indictment Makes This ‘Not the Best Time to Give Up Your AR-15’

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Fox Nation vs. Reality:
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Jon Stewart’s Snarky Swipe at Nutty Notion that a Trump Indictment Would Make Him a Martyr

Posted by on March 27, 2023 at 1:55 pm. 3 Comments :

As the walls close in on Donald Trump, he is descending ever further into an abyss of self-pity, victimhood, and malicious lies and insults aimed at the prosecutors who seek to hold him accountable for his multitude of crimes. His posts on his floundering Twitter ripoff, Truth Social, are drenched with the fear and desperation of a cornered rat.

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Jon Stewart, Donald Trump

Trump’s attacks on law enforcement range from outrageously false to blisteringly vicious as he attempts to convince his glassy-eyed cult followers that he is being persecuted by a cabal of satanic, George Soros-sponsored communists determined to drag him into the pits of hell – a destination he has been setting for himself for decades. And it’s clear that Trump’s anxieties are weighing on him as he converts his fear into threats.

RELATED: Trump Warns of ‘Death and Destruction’ if He is Indicted for Crimes that He Actually Committed

The prospect of Trump being indicted has driven debate among the pundit and political class, with his most devoted defenders latching unto the preposterous notion that if charges were brought against him it would boost his popularity and secure his electoral victory in 2024.

They might be right if they are only considering Trump’s position among his staunchly loyal disciples. They have already proven that nothing he does (assaulting women, stealing classified documents, consorting with Russians, dining with Nazis, inciting insurrections, etc.) could shake their blind adoration of him. However, the broader American public is already tired of, and disgusted by, his antics.

The idiotic idea that an indictment would bolster Trump was addressed in an interview of Jon Stewart by CNN’s Fareed Zakaria. And Stewart was on top of his game when he laid into those who embrace the “Trump as martyr” narrative…

Zakaria: There are people who say “Yes, yes. Indict him because he has, in fact, broken the laws.” And there are other people who say “This is gonna turn him into a martyr. This is his path to redemption.”
Stewart (sarcastically): I think the law should always take into account someone’s popularity. I mean, what’s happened to our country? It’s as though you can’t even commit financial fraud anymore. You can’t inflate the value of your property when you need a loan, and then deflate it with taxes. The next thing you know they’re going to send YOU to jail instead of your lawyer, and your accountant, and your campaign manager, and everyone else around you. The idea that someone may face accountability, who’s that rich and powerful, is outrageous, and this country shouldn’t stand for it.
Zakaria: But what if it turns out to be his “get out of jail free” pass? People see him as a martyr?
Stewart: We either have the rule of law, or we have no rule of law. The rule of law does not take into account if that might make you a martyr to somebody.

Indeed! The law should never consider whether a particular defendant is popular, or how his prosecution might be seen as a matter of public opinion, and especially not politically.

That said, if Trump flunkies really want to impose a standard wherein public opinion of a defendant determines whether or not to pursue prosecution, they might regret getting what they wish for. A recent poll shows that 56% of Americans say that investigations into Trump are fair, while only 41% say they are “witch hunts.” Other polls have long shown that a majority of Americans believe that Trump is responsible for the violence that occurred on January 6th.

SEE THIS: WTF? Trump Brags that 67% of Americans Say He’s Responsible for the Violent January 6th Insurrection

In the meantime, Trump’s lackeys on Capitol Hill are smoothing the way for him to commit even more crimes with absolute impunity. The GOP chairs of the House Judiciary, Oversight, and Administration committees are presently crafting legislation that would “strip state and local prosecutors of the authority to prosecute former presidents.” Never mind that it’s a blatantly unconstitutional imposition on state’s rights, something conservatives pretend to support. Or that is intended solely to shield Trump from prosecution for his innumerable crimes. It is also a futile gesture since it would never pass in the Senate or get President Biden’s signature.

This is the “thinking” of the Republican Party that is so infected with Trumpism that they would actually consider a law that would permit Trump to break any law that he wants. Which, from their warped perspective, makes sense because they believe that his lawlessness would make him even more popular among his Klan. And this is a party that thinks it has a future in American democracy?

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Jimmy Kimmel Shoots Down MTG, Tucker Carlson, and ‘The Four Gun Whores of the Apocalypse’

Posted by on February 25, 2023 at 12:06 pm. 3 Comments :

In the Era of Trump it has become harder and harder to produce good political satire when the potential subjects are so ludicrous on their own. But the Republican Party has been up to the challenge of providing the source material for searing comedy. With hysterical characters like Marjorie Taylor Greene, George Santos, and of course, Donald Trump himself, America’s humor supply remains well stocked.

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Jimmy Kimmel, Marjorie Taylor Greene

On his Friday night program, Jimmy Kimmel took aim at some of the easy targets that the GOP, and their Propaganda arm, Fox News, have provided (video below). It’s not the first time that Kimmel has featured the inadvertent buffoonery of the Republican Clown Show, and it won’t be the last.

RELATED: Jimmy Kimmel Hysterically Mocks Fox News for Whining About Biden Doing His Show

On this occasion Kimmel began by observing that many of the Fox News regulars are openly supporting Russia’s invasion of Ukraine and rooting for a Russian Victory, which Tucker Carlson said in exactly those words. These cretins are deeply devoted to Russian war criminal, Vladimir Putin, to the extent that they favor him over American leaders. And Kimmel couldn’t help but notice…

“I’m not saying that Marjorie Taylor Greene and Tucker Carlson are indebted to, or are compromised by, or have some sort of secret allegiance to Vladimir Putin in exchange for silence or money or some sort of weird nesting egg sex, but man oh man, they sure do seem to be on team Russia.”

Whereupon Kimmel played a video clip from Putin apologist Carlson’s show with Greene calling her own GOP colleagues who support Ukraine “stupid” and “so disconnected with what the American people want, that they are literally going to lead us into World War III.” She adds that Carlson is “one of the few people that tells the truth like the American people feel and talk and think on television.”

The fear mongering about World War III is a common talking point on the right, including Trump, who posted a comment on his floundering Twitter ripoff, Truth Social, this morning crying frantically that “This is the most dangerous time in the history of our Country. World War III is looming, like never before,” and that “HOPELESS JOE BIDEN IS LEADING US INTO OBLIVION!!!”

Oh no, not oblivion! What’s more, it’s particularly pitiful for Greene to say that Carlson is a teller of the truth (that people “feel”?) so soon after it was revealed that he deliberately lied to his audience about election fraud, while privately admitting that he “did not believe it for one second.”

SEE ALSO: In Dominion v Fox News, Network Cries ‘We Can’t Make People Think We’ve Turned Against Trump’

Immediately following that, Kimmel brought up the preposterous bill that a GOP representative is pushing to make the AR-15 – the preferred weapon of mass murderers – the national gun of the United States. The families of those who were slaughtered by one should appreciate that. Kimmel notes that George Santos is a co-sponsor of bill, and adds that Santos isn’t the only one…

“This dumb bill was sponsored by a congressman from Alabama named Barry Moore, with co-sponsors Santos, Andrew Clyde of Georgia and Mozzarella six-shelled person, Lauren Boebert. These are the heroes working to get us a national gun. And the next time there’s a mass shooting with an AR-15, which will probably be by the end of the week, we’ll know who to thank. The Four Gun Whores of the Apocalypse.”

While so much of what Fox News and the Trumpian Republican Party do and say is dangerous and anti-American, it is important to include comedy and satire in our arsenal of responses. Unfortunately, we may not always have that option available, thanks to Greene. The biggest joke in Congress has already distinguished herself with commentaries about “Gazpacho Police,” “Peach Tree Dishes,” “Jewish Space Lasers,” and “fragrantly” violated rights. But she is also known for having claimed to have reported Kimmel to the police for brandishing humor:

SEE: Comedy Cop Marjorie Taylor Greene Reports Jimmy Kimmel to Capitol Police for Telling a Joke

UPDATE: It was recently reported that Snowflake Trump ordered his White House staff to pressure Disney to stop Kimmel from telling jokes about him.

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Trump is Silent About the Insurrection in Brazil, But is Very Upset About Late Night Comedy TV

Posted by on January 9, 2023 at 11:39 am. 10 Comments :

Two years after the violent and deadly January 6th insurrection in Washington, D.C., that was incited by Donald Trump, supporters of his compadre in Brazil, ousted president Jair Bolsonaro, launched an eerily similar assault against their own government. Ironically, Bolsonaro was in Florida at the time.

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The parallels are too alike to ignore. The anti-democratic Bolsonaro seditionists were protesting what they believe to be a stolen election, despite having zero evidence of any irregularities. Even some of the key players are the same. Trump and two of his advisors, Steve Bannon and Jason Miller, met last month with Bolsonaro’s son at Trump’s resort/home, Mar-a-Lago. Bannon is currently appealing his felony conviction for contempt of Congress.

RELATED: Fox News on Steve Bannon Sentence: It’s Tyranny and Total BS – And We Need to Do It

In the 24 hours since the attempted coup in Brazil, Trump has been uncharacteristically silent. Perhaps his advisors managed to persuade him that speaking out in support of Bolsonaro would only remind everyone of his own traitorous behavior. The only time that Trump was so reticent to rant was during the January 6th insurrection when he didn’t say a word for nearly three hours as his StormTrumpers were besieging the Capitol.

Meanwhile, Trump had no problem spouting off about other matters that were bouncing around in his perpetually embittered brain. For instance, he rattled off a long series of exaltations of himself as the mastermind of Kevin McCarthy’s selection as Speaker of the House. And he took another swipe at Senate Republican leader “Mitch McConnell and his China flagrant boss, Coco Chow,” a racist reference to McConnell’s wife, Elaine Chao. Then Trump broadened his attack to include any senator that voted with McConnell, saying “PRIMARY THEM ALL!!!”

However, Trump truly demonstrated his comprehension (or lack thereof) of the political zeitgeist that most stirs the souls of the American people in a comment concerning a subject that he ought to more about – television. As someone who starred as a reality TV game show host for 14 years, Trump is embarrassingly ignorant of the medium. He posted on his floundering Twitter ripoff, Truth Social, the following foolishness…

“Wow, those TRUMP Hating Late Night Network ‘Shows’ are doing really badly…The worst ratings that those time slots have had (in Television History!). Why are the untalented fools who ‘host’ paid so much? Does the DNC make a $contribution as a wing of the Democrat Party? They are all a total joke – Not Talent, No Laughs!”

There’s a remarkable quantity of wrongness in that brief paragraph. Beginning with the fact that just about every TV program has suffered in the ratings due increased competition from streaming and the reemergence of movie theaters and other out-of-home entertainment after two years COVID.

It goes without saying that Trump’s opinion of the late night hosts as “untalented fools” is driven by his massive, yet fragile, ego that is incapable of tolerating jokes at his own expense. And of course he is jealous of their high salaries that are justified by the revenue they generate from advertising. Not to mention his envy that they are TV five nights a week, but he can’t get reporters to show up for his infrequent press conferences.

RELATED: LOL: Trump Starts 2023 with a New Year’s Eve Press Conference at Mar-a-Lago but Nobody Came

Trump’s crack about the DNC contributing to the pay for these hosts is a rather lame attempt to malign them politically. He seems oblivious to the fact that, if these late night comedy programs can be accused of being financial donors to Democrats, then what does that make Fox News, where the entire network is the Ministry of Propaganda for Trump and the GOP?

Trump and other right-wingnuts like to compare the ratings of the network late night shows to Greg Gutfeld on Fox News. However, that’s a blatantly dishonest comparison. The network shows air at 11:30pm local time (tape delayed) across the country. Gutfeld airs at 11:00pm Eastern time nationwide. That means that Gutfeld is on at 8:00pm in Pacific time, 9:00pm Central, etc. Therefore, most of the nation sees Gutfeld in primetime when there are more people watching television. Plus, Fox has their built-in cult audience that never changes channels.

Finally, Trump’s description of these shows as having “no laughs” raises the question: How does he know? Does he watch them? And if so, would he know a funny joke if he heard one? After all, has anyone ever actually seen him laugh? His face appears to be stuck in a permanent scowl. So he’s not exactly the best person to be criticizing comedy.

SEE ALSO: Crybaby Trump Bares His Ultra-Thin Skin in Tantrum Against Late Night Comedy Shows

NOTE: Twitter suspended the News Corpse account after 11 years without giving a reason. So if anyone wants to tweet articles from my website, please feel free to do so often and repeatedly.

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Donald Trump’s Cup of Christmas Jeer is Predictably Brimming with Hate and Ill Will Toward All

Posted by on December 25, 2022 at 9:14 am. 2 Comments :

“It’s the most wonderful time of the year…” And what could be more heartwarming and chock full of the seasonal spirit than a Christmas greeting from that perennial spreader of yuletide joy, Donald Trump? This is, after all, the Xmas savior who made it possible for Americans to once again say the words “Merry Christmas” after the dark ages when it was prohibited by pagan liberals.

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Donald Trump, Santa, Coronavirus

It’s inspiring that Trump had the spiritual fortitude to express his thoughts on this Christmas Eve while suffering the tribulations that he has been subjected to by the “Deep State” Grinches who are constantly persecuting him. Just a few days ago the House Select Committee investigating the January 6th insurrection that he incited released its final report, along with criminal referrals of Trump and his treasonous elves to the Department of Justice.

RELATED: Crybaby Trump Throws a Tantrum in Response to the House Select Committee’s Criminal Referrals

Despite having to bear his cross, Trump took the time to reach out to a weary nation on this hallowed day. He posted his celebratory tidings on his floundering Twitter ripoff, Truth Social, saying…

“Merry Christmas to EVERYONE, including the Radical Left Marxists that are trying to destroy our Country, the Federal Bureau of Investigation that is illegally coercing & paying Social and LameStream Media to push for a mentally disabled Democrat over the Brilliant, Clairvoyant, and USA LOVING Donald J. Trump, and, of course, The Department of Injustice, which appointed a Special ‘Prosecutor’ who, together with his wife and family, HATES ‘Trump’ more than any other person on earth. LOVE TO ALL!”

“Hark the heinous angel…” whines petulantly about perceived enemies while exalting himself as “Brilliant” and even divinely “Clairvoyant.” In his evening epistle Trump rattles off the list of his political peeves. As always, he leads with the ominous “Radical Left Marxists.” Then he pivots to a crackpot conspiracy about the FBI that was run by his own appointed director who reported to his Attorney General.

Furthermore, Trump would never forget to malign the “LameStream Media”. Nor will he fail to insult the current President Joe Biden as “mentally disabled.” And finally, Trump unleashes a Christmassy attack on what he childishly calls the Department of “Injustice,” and disparages the Special Counsel Jack Smith, and his wife and family, who Trump in his paranoid derangement imagines “HATES ‘Trump’ more than any other person on earth.”

RELATED: Trump Admits He’s Guilty in a Fear-Drenched Rant Attacking the Special Counsel as a ‘Monster’

Gives you goose bumps, doesn’t it? But then this is the guy who celebrates the season by selling holiday themed wrapping paper in fundraising emails that say “Let’s Go Brandon,” a popular chant in Trump World that translates to a more obscene message of “F**K Joe Biden.” So now you can wrap your children’s gifts in a festive political profanity that embraces the true spirit of a Trumpy Christmas. And yet, while he desecrates their faith, and violates all of their principles, so many evangelicals, sanctimonious Republicans, and other supposedly pious Christianists still think that Trump shares their religious beliefs. Now that would be a real Christmas miracle.

UPDATE: On Christmas morning Trump added two more posts grossly glorifying himself and his imaginary “achievements” during his occupation of the White House, while disparaging America today as a dystopian hellhole. Happy Xmas, everyone. [Update addendum: Trump posted four more Xmas comments, all whining about how horrible America is for not sufficiently worshipping him]

Nevertheless, in the spirit of the season, News Corpse would like to continue its holiday tradition by presenting a musical gift that is truly inclusive and welcoming. This is for all of those who are not huddled around a dead tree today, buried in colorfully wrapped packages. It’s for the cynics who won’t accept the notion that the birth of a messenger of peace and love is an excuse to exchange material goods or fruitcakes that nobody likes. It is for the forsaken and forlorn, the outcasts and rebels and nonbelievers who are puzzled by the greed and commercialism that permeates the season. And yes, it’s for those who still believe that peace and goodwill are morally superior to profit and oppression. Here is Miles Davis and Bob Dorough performing the heartwarming traditional Christmas ballad Blue Xmas:

NOTE: Twitter suspended the News Corpse account after 11 years without giving a reason. So if anyone wants to tweet articles from my website, please feel free to do so often and repeatedly.

Be sure to visit and follow News Corpse
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